We all have our beliefs and hold on strong to our personal principles, not to mention convictions. I'm not preaching verses from books of inspiration, nor am I advocating practices for a lifelong/after-life/no life spiritual fulfillment. Those are just a few of my points for persuassion in battling my inner angel and demon on my shoulders. Or were. I can't tell for sure now. It's times like these where I doubt and second guess myself when I am usually unyielding. I don't seem to be 'rewarded', if you may, as I might have been before. Gratification become less apparent than before, any sense of delight dawns too soon before I can go hell yeah. Seemingly so, satisfaction strings to a sad song sauced with a sad sense of satire.
It is not the past I dwell, nor the future I swell. It cannot be a measure of guilt, of that I am sure. Regret? Bah. I for one do not do regrets, and the thought of that particular statement being enlisted above amongst the uncertainties of poor me remains, thankfully, unthinkable. Or maybe it's simply me being me seeing what I not want to see rather than seeing what I should be seeing that is simply there to see.
What I see for sure is the imminent adversities and uncertainties that shrouds and surrounds me come this term and the term after. In sheer irony and cynicism, I find myself in this very peculiar spot of what we term as a very bad joke due to no other than the very actions and inactions of yours truly. My very words have come to bite me smack right at the ass and, figuratively, the bite marks are very much apparent to others. Running along that same vein of irony, time which has always been my worst enemy now becomes my very best friend forever. And as I take comfort on the shoulders of a once bitter foe, I must ultimately rely on myself to get me thru the absolute shytness of my words. Oh and did I mention, college starts in two days.